Grandma’s Diploma

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A grandmother was pushing her little grandchild around Walmart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket she would say, “And here’s something for you, Diploma,” or “This will make a cute little outfit for you, Diploma,” and so on.

Eventually a bewildered shopper who had […]

A Bad Day

A high-school student came home from school seeming rather depressed.

“What’s the matter, son,” asked his mother.

“Aw, gee,” said the boy, “it’s my marks. They’re all wet.”

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“What do you mean, “all wet”?”

“I mean,” he replied, “below C-level.”

Next Door

Dad I think the Smiths next door are angry at us.” “Why is that?”

“They’re probably mad because our dog can retrieve the newspaper, and theirs can’t.” “How could you possibly know that? We don’t even subscribe to the paper.” “Yeah, that’s probably got something to do with it, too.”

 

Posted in Animal Jokes

Growing up

A small boy came running downstairs, shouting, “Mom! Mom! I cleaned my room without being told!”

“Well,” said the mother, “that’s wonderful! Thank you very much. It will same me a lot of trouble, and it shows you are growing up.”

“Yeah, but, Mom,” said the boy, “don’t jump to conclusions.”

I don’t understand, dear,” […]

Motel Currency

When the follow called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room, the clerk told him that the rates depended on room size and number of people.

“Do you take children?’ the man asked.

“No, sir” replied the clerk. “only cash and credit cards.”

Frog Sounds

One day a boy asked his grandpa “grandpa make a frog sound”

The grandfather asked why?

The boy said, “Grandma says when you croak we are going to Hawaii”