Good Funny Jokes

Good funny jokes –  Rich Boygood funny jokes 1
Boy : Marry me.. ? Girl: Do you have a house..? Boy : No.. Girl: Do you have a BMW car.. ? Boy : No.. Girl: How much is your salary.. ? Boy : No salary.. but,.. Girl: No but. You have nothing.. How can i marry you.?? Leave please.! Boy: (talk to himself) I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferrari, 2Porsche.. Why I still need to buy BMW.?! How can I get the salary when actually I am the BOSS

Good funny jokes – Differences in Proposal
How guys propose: On one knee. How girls propose: “I’m pregnant!”

Good funny jokes – Mathematical Calculation of Women
To find a woman, you need time and money. Therefore woman=time×money. “Time is money” so time=money. Therefore woman=(money)². “Money is the root of all problems,” money=?problems. Therefore woman=(?problems)² so woman=problems.

Good funny jokes – Friends
Me- “What mouse walks on 2 feet?” Friend- “I don’t know” Me- “Mickey Mouse, what duck walks on 2 feet?” Friend- “Donald Duck?” Me- “No, all ducks dipshit” Friend- “Screw you”

Good funny jokes – Really True!!!
Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.

Good Funny Jokes

Good funny jokes – Good News
A guy is in the hospital with two broken legs. The nurse comes in and tells him that there’s good news and bad news. The guy asks for the bad news first. The nurse says, “We’re going to have to remove your legs.” Then the guy asks for the good news. The nurse says, “The guy beside you wants to buy your shoes.”

Good funny jokes – Butt Jokes
Q: What did one butt cheek say to the other?
A: Together, we can stop this sh*t.

Good funny jokes – Number
Boy: Hey Beautiful, Can I have your number? Girl: No, I have a boyfriend. Boy: But I’m gay, can I have the number now? Girl: Oh, okay! Here’s the number. Boy: Thanks, I’m not really gay. Ha! Girl: That’s my boyfriends number.

Good funny jokes – Have Kids
Boy and girl: asked the teacher very important question? “can kids of our age have kids?” Teacher replied ” NO Never!!” Boy said to girl : “see i told you not to worry!!!!

Good funny jokes – 2 Dollar
A man wins $2 million from $2 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax. Angry Man: “Give me $2 million or else return my $2 back.

Good funny jokes – Apple Fight
Dad: Shame on you, Peter. Why did you hit your little sister? Peter: Well, Daddy, we were playing Adam and Eve with the apple and all. Well, instead of tempting me with that apple, she ate the thing herself!

Good funny jokess – Kick
“Mary, why did you kick your brother in the stomach?! exclaimed the angry mother. “It was pure accident, Mama. He turned around.”

Good funny jokes – Chinese and the Boss’s Wife
A Chinese man rings his boss, “Me no work I sick.” Boss says, “When I’m sick, I make love with my wife. Try that.” Two hours later the Chinese man rings back, “Me better, you got nice house.”

Good funny jokes – God Gets Better
“Did God make you, Papa?” “Yep! He certainly did.” “And did He make me too?” “Of course, He did.” “Well, He’s certainly doing better as He goes along, isn’t He?”

Good funny jokes – No Idea
I told my girlfriend that my mom is old so she needs to speak slowly and loud. Then I told my mom my girlfriend is retarded. They have no idea!

Good funny jokes – Poor Husband
Husband: Honey, do u smell that? Wife: No. Husband: Yeah, me neither, start cooking.

Good funny jokes – How to make a girl furious in 2 steps…
Step 1, take a picture of her Step 2, don’t show it to her

Good funny jokes – Lottery
Husband: What would you do if i won the lottery? Wife: I’d take half and leave. Husband: Well here’s $6 and you can start packing anytime now.

Clean Funny Jokesgood funny jokes

Clean funny jokes – A man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds “Wife Wanted”.
The next day, he received hundreds of replies,
all reading: “You can have mine.”

Clean funny jokes – Sharma: Roz subah 15 ladkiyan mera intezaar karti hain..
verma: Woh kaise?
Sharma: Main Girls College ki Van ka driver hun!!

Clean funny jokes – Gunde ka beta oral exam mein fail ho gaya aur aakar apne baap se bola: Un logon ne 3 ghante tak meri puchtach ki magar apun bhi teri aulad hai, saala kuch bhi nahi bola

Clean funny jokes – Tum paas aae
Yun muskuraye
Apne 32 dant
Mujko dikhaye
Dekh ke mera dil
Phoot Phoot ke rota hai
Yaar tumse BRUSH bhi
Theek se nahi hota hai

Clean funny jokes – u r genius,
ur mind is a master piece.
It is divided into left and right.
In the left part nothing is right
and in right part nothing is left.

Clean funny jokes – Santa selling parachute.
U Can Jump from plane & press button & u can land safely.
Customer: if parachute doesn’t open?
Santa: Paisa Wapas

Clean funny jokes – Sardar: Shirt K Liye Badhiya Kapda Dikhana?
SalesMan: PLAIN Me Dikhau?
Sardar: Hawai Jahaaz Tak
Jaane Ki Kya Zarurat Hai?
Yahi Dikha.

Clean funny jokes – Q. Aap me aur Pepsi me kya Similarity hai?

Ans: Both r cool, sweet, Sub pasand karte hai aur most important similarity is

Dimaag wali jagah DHAKAN hai

Clean funny jokes – Santa -I kiss my wife daily before i go to office,
Banta -I kiss ur wife after u go to office,
Santa-oye balle balle first to main hi aya!

Clean funny jokes – Pe-peep Pe”peep
Peep peep Pe’peep
Ghng ghngg
Saaamnay se hatJaaao
SMS aa raha hai

Clean funny jokes – Me aapko ENGLISH ka 1 word bhejta hu,clean funny jokes
Jise aap aage se padho ya pichhe se,
aapko aapka hi naam dikhai dega,
– U L L U

Clean funny jokes – Yahoooooo…….!
Exams ki saari taiyaari ho gayi
Sab Taiyyar hai
Padhna baki hai …:

Clean funny jokes – Husband : Tumse Shaadi Karke Mujhe Ek Bahut Faayada Hua.
Wife :kaun Sa Faayada?
Husband : Mujhe Mere Gunaaho ki Saza Jeete-Jee Hi Mil Gai

More Good Funny Jokes

Good funny jokes – Father: I have seen you love your mum more than me. Do you love me or your mum more?
Son: I love both of you equally much.
Father: What if I go America and your mum goes to Paris, where will you go?
Son: Paris of course, it is much beautiful there.
Father: Then what if I go Paris and your mum goes America, where will you go?
Son: America!
Father: So you’re bent on following your mum?
Son: No, it’s because I already went to Paris!

Good funny jokes – Two Best advices for safe life :
1. Always speak the truth, no matter how bitter harsh it is ..
2. Run immediately after saying it.

Good funny jokes – Gals have two major problems with their wardrobe:
1. Nothing to wear &
2. No place to keep her clothes.
Guys have two major problems with their laptop:
1. Nothing to watch &
2. No space for anything new..!!

Good funny jokes – A Beggar Found Rs. 100/-

He Went To A 5 Star Hotel For Dinner…

Bill Rs. 3000/-

He was unable to pay!!!
Manager Handed Him To Police!!!
He Gave Rs. 100/- To Policeman & Free!!!

Good funny jokes – Two Tigers were resting under a tree..
Suddenly a RABBIT passed very fast
Tiger could not make out & asked
“What was that?”
2nd Tiger smiled and said:
Fast Food.

Good funny jokes – A man meets an accident with his new Ferrari.
Policemen arrives.
Man:- (cried) Officer! My brand new car!
Police replied:- You’re suchmaterialistic.
You even haven’t notice that your left
arm has been cut off.
Man-: (He looks at his left arm and yells.)
OMG! My Rolex watch!.

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